A couple weeks ago I found an old diary from when I was between the ages of 7-9. I realized a couple things: I was a weird kid, I was obsessed Harry Potter and I judged everyone. It's human nature to compare yourself to someone else...but that doesn't make it right. In my second grade diary it had questions like "what do you want to be when you grow up", "what is your biggest secret" and "who do you have a crush on". I got some quality laughs out of this old diary - it brought back some great and seemingly awful memories. It was a great reminder that things can be horrible and hard at the moment in which they happen, but years later they will seem like no big deal. One of my "biggest secrets" in 2001 was that someone told the youth group I liked Coby. I was devastated and I thought my life was over. Truth be told, I don't actually remember that event happening, but I wrote about it on December 16, 2001.
On another page, it had a question and provided space to make a list, "These are my friends"- it was cute to see my old handwriting and the names on the list. I went through the list taking pictures of the names to show these people we were "friends" in my diary way back in the day! After reading the names a couple times over, I was horrified to see what the next list in the book was, "These are not my friends". I don't know what kind of diary promotes animosity in elementary school girls, but I got a couple good laughs out of the names on that list as well. I didn't remember half the people I wrote, except for Coby (got a great laugh here). I noticed that I had crossed people off my friend list and moved them to the "not friends list" or lower on the "friends" list. I immediately became embarrassed; I had ranked my friends on their level of importance. I have no idea why some people were lower than others or what caused them to suddenly not be my friend, but it's funny and awful that as an 8 year old, I thought this was acceptable behavior.
The devotion for today comes from Genesis 37:3-8. It talks about the problem of having favorites. The problem with favorites is that if you are someone's favorite, than you think everything revolves around you. It's easy for you to get into trouble with other people. The problem is that we show preferential treatment when we should be treating everyone as if they are special - everyone is then special and the same. I'm 22 and I struggle with treating everyone the same way. I have some really great friends that I've had since middle school and I have some really great sorority sisters that I've connected with over the past 2 years. As a child, my mom would sing me that infamous song about the quality of friendship: "make new friends, but keep the old, one is silver and the other's gold". I have two main different sets of friends, one from my childhood and the other from college. The only difference between these two groups is the amount of time we've spent together. They're all special people to me and ones I've deeply relied on through the tragedy in my life.
My problem with this notion of everyone being a "favorite" or a "best friend" is that our society rejects it. Who do you pick to be a bridesmaid if everyone is the same quality friend? If you win Wheel of Fortune, and are unattached, who do you take with you on your destination trip? Or, the most honest of all questions: if you have one piece of gum left, who would you give it to? Nobody can honestly say they'd pick just anyone for any of these questions - regardless of their extremity. The point that strikes me as odd - we make up society. If we begin to reject these societal norms and treat everyone as if they're special, valued and NEEDED than maybe we can prevent future generations from ranking their friends in a diary or worse. I think part of the reason people act out, make hit-lists and resort to suicide is that somewhere along the line, someone made them feel like they didn't matter. Maybe someone told their secret or crossed their name of the bff list...we should work to promote kindness and love towards everyone, even if they get on your nerves or have wronged you once before.
I have a dream that one day Harry Potter will actually be cool. I have a dream that diaries printed in 2014 will come without a "These are not my friends" list. I have a dream that diaries continue to provide an outlet for children to write about the things that make them angry or upset...no matter how trivial they may be; at the time these events, people and situations matter. I have a dream that kids will play together on a playground, in the sandbox or cyberly without isolation. I have a dream that college kids will be able to forgive, forget and move on from gossip and slanderous words. I have a dream that people will trust and love one another because it's what's right and good. The world needs more Good News - let's celebrate Christ's love by giving preferential treatment to all our friends, the good and the bad ones. It's not our place to judge whether or not they truly deserve it.
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